KU: M/M SF

Jan. 16th, 2022 11:26 pm
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Hot Air by TJ Land - "Bluster is the most incompetent supervillain around. He’s a klutz. He’s forgetful. His schemes never work. He never remembers to plan his escape, which doesn’t matter given that most superheroes don’t even bother sending him to prison anymore. Hardly anyone takes him seriously. That’s why he decided to retire a while ago. It had nothing to do with the fact that his handsome nemesis, Judge Justice, was forced to hand in his superhero license after finally breaking one too many rules. And Bluster’s decision to give up his retirement on the same day Judge Justice gets his license back is purely coincidental.

Judge Justice is the toughest superhero around. He’s edgy. He’s grim. He wears a lot of leather. As far as he’s concerned, supervillains are criminals, nothing more and nothing less. They deserve everything that’s coming to them. Sure, maybe he’s got a reputation for being harsh. So what? His methods work. When you’re dealing with a town full of caped crooks, no amount of force is excessive…except maybe when it comes to Bluster. That guy’s hopeless. It’s not that the Judge has a soft spot for him, but anyone can see that Bluster’s a bigger threat to himself than to the city. Which isn’t to say the Judge isn’t outraged when Bluster comes out of retirement the same day he gets his license back. He’s furious. Not even a tiny bit thrilled, because he’s not one of those imbeciles who actually likes his nemesis. He’s a professional. That’s why, when the Judge learns that Bluster’s in danger, he immediately appoints himself his guardian. After all, it’s a hero’s duty to protect the weak.

Bluster, however, has other ideas..."

Good As Gold by TJ Land - "Being the most powerful superhero in the world can get lonely.

Ask the Golden Ranger. He’s still struggling to make friends after landing on Earth two years ago, even now that he’s become a member of the Remarkables. Humans are just so complicated, with their odd aversion to public nudity, their obsession with sex, and their temperamental genitals.

Thank goodness for his villains. Sure, they’re crooks and it’s his job to thwart them, but at least they offer him a chance for social interaction. And they’re all pretty cool, as villains go. Henry X has a gun that can fire anything from exploding bullets to robot bees, and he's also got these incredible biceps and warm brown eyes – not that the Golden Ranger cares about stuff like that. Light Brigade can create holograms, plus he’s handsome and snarky and covered in tattoos – again, not that the Golden Ranger cares. The Sash can use his clothing as a weapon, which isn’t really fair seeing as how his slinky body would be an effective weapon all by itself. Which isn’t something the Golden Ranger cares about. At all.

It’s possible that the other Remarkables are right when they accuse the Golden Ranger of being a little too intrigued by his rogues gallery. But he thinks they’re just jealous. Even so, when they tell him that Henry X, Light Brigade and the Sash are working for someone who might be a threat to the whole city, the Golden Ranger knows he needs to learn the truth. And what better way to do that than by adopting a civilian disguise and getting to know his villains personally? It’s a brilliant plan. Nothing can go wrong."

The Amateur by TJ Land - "Worst thing about being a supervillain? Getting your butt handed to you by caped do-gooders. Best thing about being a supervillain? Getting your hands on caped do-gooders' butts. Heh.

Red Velvet and his two partners in crime – super-strong beefcake Ares and proud degenerate the Electric Eel – are the League of Larceny, the most notorious gang in town. They’ve been together in every sense of the word for years, and these days everyone knows better than to mess with them. Which is why they're surprised to have their weekly heist interrupted by a rookie hero.

His costume is hideous. His banter is corny. His body is amazing. He’s Mister Valiant and he’s here to save the day. Or if not, then at least he might prove to be an amusing distraction for a few bored bad guys..."

The Tools That Ran Away by TJ Land - "They were built to be tools. Now they have to learn how to be people.

After escaping their alien masters, three robots – Meteor, Gloss, and Spike – land on Earth and begin their search for a weapon that, they believe, will make them invincible. But Earth is far more complicated than they’d expected; rife with bacteria and feelings.

To Meteor’s horror, his teammates soon begin to deviate from their mission. Gloss, their scientist, finds himself enchanted by a young human named Gonzalo, their budding romance only slightly hampered when Gloss accidentally cuts off his arm with a laser. Spike, the muscle, is distracted by Earth’s stunning natural beauty and wanders into the nearest ocean the moment Meteor’s back is turned.

But Meteor won’t be seduced by their new home’s curious charms. He’s got a job to do. Finding the weapon will mean that the three of them can defend themselves when their masters come looking for them – and they will.

In fact, they’re only days away."

Jon's by AJ Sherwood - ""

All the Wrong Reasons by Sebastian Hansen - ""

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Changed: Mated to the Alien Alpha by Robin Moray - "The Company said Omega IV was uninhabited. They said Omega IV was safe.
They were wrong.


The giant humanoid inhabitants of Omega IV are conditioned to the Change—a biological event in their development that designates them altha or amekha—but for the new colony of humans, the Change comes as an unpleasant surprise.

Dr Cameron Grant, bitter after a turbulent break-up, finds himself in a first-contact situation that was never covered in training.The alien warrior Tal'jen, seven feet tall and distinctly male, has taken an interest in him, an interest with a clear and pressing conclusion. Dr Grant can't deny his attraction, even as his body undergoes strange and frightening changes. Whatever is happening to him, it's obvious that Tal'jen understands it instinctively. He will have to place himself in the hands of an alien and hope that Tal'jen's interest is as benign as it seems.

Meanwhile, Tal'jen, chief-in-waiting of his people, seeks a mate. The handsome and strange Cam'ren of the newcomers calls to him powerfully, though he has not yet gone through his Change. To be chief Tal'jen must mate with a bearer, so while he longs to claim Cam'ren for his own, he must be patient and hope that Cam'ren's Change will grant him the gift of bearing young.

As the Change spreads through the human colony, leaving chaos in its wake, Cameron and Tal'jen must fight to protect both the delicate bond growing between them, and each other."

The Earl and the Executive by Kai Butler - "An impoverished earl...

Tiral Oican has inherited his brother’s title, estate, and the tremendous debt his brother took out before his unexpected death. There is only one option to save the estate and all the people who are now depending on him: marry a rich heir who is willing to pay off the debt in exchange for Tiral’s title.

Now, scholarly Tiral must transform himself into a seductive fortune hunter. The only way he can see through the mess is by hiring a tutor in love. It’s too bad that Zev is so good at his job that Tiral is falling for him.

And a rich entrepreneur...

To protect his heart, Zev Laft has spent years fooling the ton into believing he’s no more than an entertaining flirtation. He just didn’t expect the ruse to work so well that the newest penniless earl to arrive on Lus for the season would assume him a demimonde and try to hire him to be his instructor in courtship.

Now one of richest men in the empire finds himself struggling to keep up the façade, when his own heart is being taken by a man he has no intention of marrying.

The Earl and the Executive is a slow burn stand alone 90,000 word MM Regency Romance Novel set in space with a HEA."

Feral by Alessandra Hazard - "Sometimes kissing the Beast doesn't turn it into a Prince Charming—instead, he's a charming prince you want to punch...

Jules is an ordinary nineteen-year-old omega from a perfectly respectable family. He’s not the most beautiful, or the smartest, or the strongest of the four Blake siblings. And he’s fine with it, really. He isn’t ugly or anything, but by omega standards, he’s nothing special. “Nothing special” describes Jules’s whole life. It’s utterly boring.

So when strange things start happening in their house, it piques Jules’s curiosity. There’s a beast in the Blake family mansion; Jules is sure of it. He sometimes hears growls and screams coming from the basement, and the men guarding the door look positively terrified. What could terrify grown alphas? Jules will have to investigate!

But his investigation comes with surprises…like the Beast’s overwhelming effect on Jules’s omega nature. It doesn’t mean anything. Of course it doesn’t. Jules is just curious; that’s all.

Curiosity can change a life, but when you’re attracted to a feral alpha whose real face you haven’t even seen...will it change for the better? What if the Beast is no Prince Charming but a cold-hearted, cynical bastard? A bastard Jules shouldn’t want - but does. A bastard Jules should stay away from - but can’t."

A Villain for Christmas by Alice Winters - "Despite growing up in a family of villains, I’d rather curl up and read than commit crimes. When I get coerced by my brother into helping him rob a bank, I run into August, my childhood crush—also known as Chrono, the city’s greatest superhero. He’s sexy, sweet, and suddenly he’s asking me to Thanksgiving with his parents. It’s probably because he doesn’t realize that I’m Leviathan, a villain with the power of telekinesis. And I can’t tell him because he’d never forgive me and would stop doing things like cooking for me—wait, maybe that would be a good thing, since he’s a terrible cook. It doesn’t help that my parents think they’re the ultimate villains and won’t stop getting in my way, although they can’t even steal toilet paper without getting caught.

But when real supervillains (not the wannabe kind that I grew up with) start targeting August, I might be forced to show everyone who I truly am: a slightly warped and snarky man who’d really rather read a book than save anything… besides August. I’ll tear this world apart just to get another glimpse of him in those glasses and spandex suit. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep him safe, even though it means exposing my true identity. Luckily, August still cares about me, proving that even a villain and a hero can fall in love. Hopefully, we’ll be able to save the world in time for Christmas.

This ridiculous and snarky holiday novel is 92,000 words and contains a villain turned unlikely hero (even if he’s a manager's worst nightmare), a superhero with a fondness for suckers who absolutely does NOT use his powers to cheat on board games, a hairless cat with an unfortunate name, bumbling family members that try to be evil but are mostly just embarrassing, a snow globe with mysterious powers, betrayal, true love, a risqué Santa suit, and the saltiest chicken ever.

Although this book is part of A Snow Globe Christmas series, it is a complete standalone, and it isn’t a requirement that you read the previous books to follow along. We wish everyone a happy holiday season.
"

Human Omega: Discovered on the Slave Planet by Eileen Glass - "How does a bad day get worse, you ask?

Well...

How about being squished between two huge, naked dudes with their meaty schlongs hanging out and everything?

It's all a matter of opinion, but Carter's day is going pretty badly. He's an engineer captured by bug aliens, now depending on his large, muscled, naked cage mates for food and warmth. They seem sentient, so that's good. But they're also handsy. Which is… complicated.

The military isn't looking for him. Slaves taken by the bug race never come back. Yet, Carter is very much alive, and if he wants to stay that way, he'll need to trust Pykh and Siel, two affectionate aliens with claws, teeth, and size."
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The Kingpin of Camelot by Cassandra Gannon - "In a world where fairytale characters are real, there are laws in place that attempt to keep the wicked witches, ugly stepsisters, and big, bad, wolves under control. But now, the bad guys are fighting for their rights...

The Queen: Guinevere must save Camelot. Ever since Arthur died, the evil Scarecrow has been trying to marry her and gain the crown. Unfortunately, the only man strong enough to help her is Kingpin Midas, a flashy, uneducated mobster dealing with a curse. Gwen is a logical, rational woman, though, and she can draft one hell of a contract. She’s pretty sure she can come up with an offer not even the kingdom’s greatest villain can refuse.

The Kingpin: Anything Midas touches turns to gold. Literally. The curse has helped him to rule Camelot’s underworld with an iron fist. He’s convinced there’s nothing he can’t buy. One look at Gwen and Midas knows that he’s about to make his most brilliant purchase, yet. He’s about to own the one woman in the world he would give anything to possess. All he has to do to claim her is somehow win a war against the smartest man in Camelot, hide his growing feelings from Gwen, and adjust to a five year old demanding bedtime stories from a gangster. Simple, right?

Can their “fake marriage” become more real than either of them ever imagined?"

Once Upon a Caveman by Cassandra Gannon - "Lucy Meadowcroft’s life hasn’t turned out the way she planned. Her hometown always thought she’d go out and change the world. Instead, fifteen years out of high school, Lucy’s working in a bookstore and her social life consists of sex dreams about a caveman named Rhawn. Granted, they’re pretty awesome dreams, but it’s not like the guy is real, right? He’s smart and gorgeous and totally a figment of her frustrated imagination. All in all, things could be going a lot better for her. When Lucy reluctantly agrees to go on the Woodward High Reunion Cruise, she’s feeling pretty miserable about her place in the world.

…And that’s before the shipwreck.

Now Lucy’s somehow marooned in the Ice Age. She’s stranded on an island filled with guys in loincloths who think she’s “the Destroyer,” an evil goddess sent to sink their homeland into the sea. This is *so* not what the alumni committee promised in the cruise brochure. The wooly mammoths and sabretooth tigers running around tell Lucy that she’s a castaway in some other world. And in the middle of this prehistoric insanity, Lucy finds herself face-to-face with the caveman from her dreams.

Rhawn the Accursed is reviled within the Clan. Every night, he dreams of Earth, the land of the gods, and of the Destroyer, the deity destined to end the world. Rhawn realizes that Lucy must be the wicked goddess, but he also senses that this woman is meant to be his mate. There is good in her. He knows it. All he has to do is persuade the rest of the Clan not to kill her, show Lucy that they were fated to find one another, devise a way to escape the island, and survive Lucy’s annoying classmates, who’ve washed ashore with her. It shouldn’t be that hard.

After all, they have a few days left before the volcano erupts."

The King's Spinster Bride by Ruby Dixon - "Sixteen years ago, Princess Halla of Yshrem saved the life of an eight-year-old barbarian boy and watched her kingdom fall to ruin, all on the same day. Now, she is a forgotten spinster in a quiet temple, living her days out in solitude. The last of her line, she exists in the hope that she has been forgotten, for to be remembered by the enemy is to be certain death.

One person has not forgotten her. Mathior, now twenty-four, is the fierce warrior king of the Cyclopae. Yshrem is in turmoil and his advisors have a suggestion – kill the last remaining member of the royal line, and there will be no rivals for the throne.

Mathior has a different idea. He’s loved Halla for sixteen long years, and it’s time he claimed her as his wife. But a barbarian’s wedding customs are unlike any other..."

Fated Blades by Ilona Andrews - "At first glance, the planet Rada seems like a lush paradise. But the ruling families, all boasting genetically enhanced abilities, are in constant competition for power—and none more so than the Adlers and the Baenas. For generations, the powerful families have pushed and pulled each other in a dance for dominance.

Until a catastrophic betrayal from within changes everything.

Now, deadly, disciplined, and solitary leaders Ramona Adler and Matias Baena must put aside their enmity and work together in secret to prevent sinister forces from exploiting universe-altering technology. Expecting to suffer through their uneasy alliance, Ramona and Matias instead discover that they understand each other as no one in their families can—and that their combined skills may eclipse the risks of their forbidden alliance.

As the two warriors risk their lives to save their families, they must decide whether to resist or embrace the passion simmering between them. For now, the dance between their families continues—but just one misstep could spell the end of them both."

The Wedding Night by Kati Wilde - "When an opportunity to take everything from the powerful family who destroyed his mother’s life falls into Caleb Moore’s lap, he needs help from the one person with more power and money than they have — business mogul, Audrey Clarke. The trick is getting her attention. So he approaches the infamous ice queen with an unusual proposition: marriage.

The odds of a snowball surviving in hell are better than the chances of a rich, classy lady like Audrey Clarke marrying a mechanic from the wrong side of the tracks. He only hopes that she might consider a business partnership when she’s finished laughing at his marriage proposal. He never expects her to say yes — or that the ice queen could burn so hot.

Because Audrey Clarke isn’t cold at all. And if Caleb’s not careful, the only thing he’ll give her on their wedding night...is a broken heart."

Hot and Badgered by Shelly Laurenston - "It’s not every day that a beautiful naked woman falls out of the sky and lands face-first on grizzly shifter Berg Dunn’s hotel balcony. Definitely they don’t usually hop up and demand his best gun. Berg gives the lady a grizzly-sized t-shirt and his cell phone, too, just on style points. And then she’s gone, taking his XXXL heart with her. By the time he figures out she’s a honey badger shifter, it’s too late.

Honey badgers are survivors. Brutal, vicious, ill-tempered survivors. Or maybe Charlie Taylor-MacKilligan is just pissed that her useless father is trying to get them all killed again—and won’t even tell her how. Protecting her little sisters has always been her job, and she’s not about to let some pesky giant grizzly protection specialist with a network of every shifter in Manhattan get in her way. Wait. He’s trying to help? Why would he want to do that? He’s cute enough that she just might let him tag along—that is, if he can keep up..."

Badger to the Bone by Shelly Laurenston - "She’s the woman he’s been hired to kidnap. But ZeZé Vargas has other ideas . . . like getting them both out of this nightmare alive. Just one problem. She’s crazy. Certifiably. Because while he’s plotting their escape, the petite Asian beauty is plotting something much more deadly . . .

Max “Kill It Again” MacKilligan has no idea what one of her own is doing with all these criminal humans until she realizes that Zé has no idea who or what he is. Or exactly how much power he truly has.

But Max is more than happy to bring this handsome jaguar shifter into her world and show him everything he’s been missing out on. A move that might be the dumbest thing she’s ever done once she realizes how far her enemies will go to wipe her out. Too bad for them Zé is willing to do whatever it takes to keep her alive . . . and honey badgers are just so damn hard to kill!"

The Blacksmith Queen by GA Aiken (aka Shelly Laurenston) - "The Old King Is Dead

With the demise of the Old King, there’s a prophesy that a queen will ascend to the throne of the Black Hills. Bad news for the king’s sons, who are prepared to defend their birthright against all comers. But for blacksmith Keeley Smythe, war is great for business. Until it looks like the chosen queen will be Beatrix, her younger sister. Now it’s all Keeley can do to protect her family from the enraged royals.

Luckily, Keeley doesn’t have to fight alone. Because thundering to her aid comes a clan of kilt-wearing mountain warriors called the Amichai. Not the most socially adept group, but soldiers have never bothered Keeley, and rough, gruff Caid, actually seems to respect her. A good thing because the fierce warrior will be by her side for a much longer ride than any prophesy ever envisioned..."

The Mages of Bennamore by Pauline M Ross - "Fen is used to hiding away in her coastal town, keeping her past and her magic far from prying eyes. But the aftermath of the brief war with Bennamore pits her against a different kind of magic, and throws her quiet life into turmoil, threatening to expose all her secrets.

Mal’s job as guard to the mages of Bennamore has always been a bit dull, but that was before they were sent to bring magic to the resentful coastal folk. Before he knows it, he finds himself in the middle of riots, disappearances and thievery. And then there’s the infuriatingly snooty Fen, a woman he’d love to tame.

The two will have to overcome their mutual dislike and join forces to untangle the dragon’s nest of deceit around them, or else their countries will be plunged back into disastrous war."

Don't Rush Me by Jackie May - "Most humans have no idea that a dark and deadly underworld, filled with magic and monsters, exists. They wander through life blissfully ignorant of the supernatural world around them. Nora Jacobs is different. Nora knows exactly what kinds of hellish creatures haunt the streets of Detroit.

Thanks to a unique set of psychic abilities, Nora has managed to steer clear of the underworld most of her life. But all that changes the night the most powerful vampire in the city discovers her gifts and decides to use her as a tool to find one of his missing clan members.

As if that’s not bad enough, Nora believes she’s cursed. All her life, people, especially men, have been drawn to her—some to the point of obsession and violence. Underworlders, it seems, are not immune to this curse, and now she’s caught the attention of some of the most dangerous monsters in the city.

Neck deep in an investigation only she can solve, Nora quickly makes as many new allies as she does enemies. Her biggest problem is staying alive long enough to decide which is which.

*This is a slow burn reverse harem novel with adult themes that some may find triggering."

KU: SF/F

Jan. 16th, 2022 11:24 pm
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Poor Man's Fight by Elliott Kay - "Quick-witted Tanner Malone has bombed the Test, an all-important exam that establishes how much he owes for his corporate-funded education. With his future plans crushed under a mountain of debt, Tanner enlists in the navy of his home star system of Archangel. But he hasn’t factored in the bullying shipmates, the civil war brewing on the border, or the space pirates.

As Tanner begins basic training, the government ramps up its forces to confront the vicious raiders wreaking havoc throughout human space. Led by the complex and charismatic Captain Casey, the outlaws never let their egalitarian and democratic ideals get in the way of a little murder or mayhem.

Assigned to the front lines, Tanner learns there’s only one way to deal with his ruthless foes, cruel comrades, and the unforgiving void of space. He’ll have to get up close and personal."

Ascend Online by Luke Chmilenko - "It's time to be the hero you've always wanted to be.
Diving into a revolutionary new video game, Marcus and his friends escape a stagnant society, entering into a world that defies their wildest imaginations. But from the moment that he logs in, Marcus finds himself separated from his friends and thrown into remote village under attack by a horde of goblins.

Forced into battle, Marcus rallies the beleaguered villagers and with their help, manages to drive off the invading creatures. With the village in ruins and their supplies spoiled, the survivors desperately turn to Marcus for help in rebuilding the village.

Realizing that this game is nothing like he's ever played before, Marcus is swept up into a whirlwind of adventure as he struggles to defend his new home, quickly finding that marauding goblins are the least of his problems."

Cinnamon Bun: A Wholesome LitRPG by RavensDagger - "The world called out for a hero to purge it of a great evil. It received Broccoli Bunch, explorer, expert cleaner, occasional ghost-buster, and full time Cinnamon Bun. Features include:
Talking enemies into becoming friends
Hugging menu boxes
Awesome overpowered skills (such as Cleaning, and Gardening)
And more adventure than you could shake a stick at!"

Steam Legion by Evan Currie - "The Library would not burn. Dyna of Sparta would not allow it, on her life and her ancestors she so swore.

An Epic adventure set during the Early Roman Empire's era of expansion and unrest. Steam Legion develops from a real historical crossroads and explodes out in a new direction, derailing our history centuries before the first railroads were invented.

When the revolts against the Empire reach the city of Alexandria, a small cadre of Legionnaires find themselves thrust into a revolution not of religion but of technology. Watch as Dyna of Sparta, Heron of Alexandria, and those who stand with them forge a new path to the future. Epic military action mixed with sparkling and memorable characters brings Legion to life, while forgotten technologies of our own distant past provide hope in an uncertain world.

Watch and learn as Dyna of Sparta steps out of the Ivory Tower of the Library and into the sandals of her ancestors, blade in hand, to defend that which had become her life."

Spellmonger by Terry Mancour - "Minalan gave up a promising career as a professional warmage to live the quiet life of a village spellmonger in the remote mountain valley of Boval. It was a peaceful, beautiful little fief, far from the dangerous feudal petty squabbles of the Five Duchies, on the world of Callidore. There were cows. Lots of cows. And cheese.

For six months things went well: he found a quaint little shop, befriended the local lord, the village folk loved him, he found a sharp young apprentice to help out, and best yet, he met a comely young widow with the prettiest eyes . . .

Then one night Minalan is forced to pick up his mageblade again to defend his adopted home from the vanguard of an army of goblins – gurvani, they call themselves – bent on a genocidal crusade against all mankind. And that was the good news. The bad news was that their shamans were armed with more magical power than has been seen since the days of the ancient Imperial Magocracy – and their leader, a mysterious, vengeful force of hate and dark magic, is headed directly to Boval Vale, along with a massive invading army of gurvani. The good people of Boval and their spellmonger have only one choice: to hole up in the over-sized Boval Castle and hope they can endure a siege against hundreds of thousands of goblins.

When the people look to him for hope, Minalan does his best, but the odds are depressing: there are multitudes of goblins, and they want Boval Vale as a staging ground for a vengeful invasion of the whole Five Duchies.

Add to his troubles a jealous rival mage, a motley band of mercenaries, a delusional liege lord who insists victory is at hand despite the hordes at his door, a dour castellan, a moody, pregnant girlfriend and a catty ex-girlfriend who specializes in sex magic - all trapped in a stinking, besieged castle with no hope of rescue, and you’ll understand why Minalan is willing to take his chances with the goblins.

All that stands between the gurvani horde and the people of the Five Duchies is one tired, overwhelmed baker’s son who wanted nothing more than to be a simple village spellmonger."

Perilous Waif by E William Brown - "My name is Alice Long, and I’ve always known I was different.

When I was little I used to climb up to the highest branches of the housetree at night, and watch the starships docking at the orbital stations high above. Forty meters off the ground, watching ships thirty thousand kilometers overhead, with senses that could pick out radar pings and comm chatter as easily as the ships themselves. It all seemed perfectly natural at the time.

There were other kids with mods at the orphanage, but nothing like that. I learned fast to downplay my abilities, keep my mouth shut and try to blend in. Even as a kid I knew not to trust the Matrons. What would they do, if they realized the Adjustments that were supposed to make me a meek little herd animal didn’t do anything?

Then I messed up, and gave myself away.

Now I’m on the run, hoping against hope that the Matrons won’t try too hard to find me. Hoping to survive all the awful things that can happen to a girl on her own in space. Kidnappers, slavers, pirates and yakuza - no matter where I go, trouble always seems to find me.

Good thing I’m not as helpless as I look."

KU: F/F

Jan. 16th, 2022 11:23 pm
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Boomball by TJ Land - "Boomball. The most dangerous sport in the galaxy. So dangerous only robots are allowed to play it.

Firewire is a midfielder for The Circuit Breakers, a boomball team gunning for the championship. If they win, they get access to a world of privileges most robots can only dream of.

So it's a real pain in the ass that Firewire's gone and got herself a crush on one of their fiercest rivals."

Eternity's Sunrise by TJ Land - "God is dead. The angels wish they were so lucky.

Leaderless, they’ve split into two factions; gentle, community-oriented Virtues who care for the land, and passionate, glory-hungry Thrones who slay demons.

Joy is a Virtue who, bored with her slow-paced existence, makes a decision: she’s going to become a warrior. The best warrior Heaven has ever seen.

So, naturally, she picks a fight with the first (and biggest) Throne she comes across."

Second Chances by Eliza Lentzski - "High school can be Hell. Especially when you grow up in a small town where everyone knows your business and you can't avoid the gossip about your past. That's why, as soon as she graduated, Reagan Murphy moved to New York City to start again. Now in her junior year at NYU and with her childhood positioned in the rearview mirror, the future looks limitless. But when she unexpectedly runs into the one person responsible for the misery of her high school years, will she keep running or will she stick around long enough for a second chance?

Allison Hoge, statuesque and beautiful, made sure she remained at the top of the social pyramid even if it meant stepping on a few heads to get there. But even she had her own secrets to evade after graduation. College can change a person - it can be a new start - an opportunity for reinvention. So when she unexpectedly runs into the one person for whom she made high school especially miserable, will history repeat itself or has she changed enough to be given a second chance?"

Apophis: A Love Story for the End of the World by Eliza Lentzski - "From a very young age, Samantha Poulsen knew she was different from other girls - the unrequited crush on her best friend, Andrea, was just the tip of the iceberg. But when the earth's temperature plummets and you and your family are just looking to survive, things like finding a girlfriend and being in love become trivial fantasies.

Scientists first spotted the asteroid in the year 2004. They named it 99942 Apophis after the deification of darkness. When the asteroid struck the planet, it set off a chain of events that few expected – the first Ice Age in nearly 12,500 years.

The flowers were the first things to die. Beautiful things of little practical value had no place in the new world that emerged because of the Frost. Now, two years after Apophis’s impact, survival is all that matters. But when Sam's family rescues a man and his daughter - a beautiful woman named Nora who reignites all those previously banished, trivial emotions - Sam might be convinced that there’s still a place for beauty in this new world."

Good Enough to Eat by Alison Grey & Jae - "Robin’s New Year’s resolution to change her eating habits is as unusual as she is. Unlike millions of other women, she isn’t tempted by chocolate or junk food. She’s a vampire, determined to fight her craving for a pint of O negative.

When she goes to an AA meeting, hoping for advice on fighting her addiction, she meets Alana, a woman who battles her own demons.

Despite their determination not to get involved, the attraction is undeniable.

Is it just bloodlust that makes Robin think Alana looks good enough to eat, or is it something more? Will it even matter once Alana finds out who Robin really is?"

Paper Love by Jae - "Susanne Wolff isn’t thrilled when her mother sends her all the way across the country to Freiburg to save her uncle’s stationery store from bankruptcy. Freiburg is too provincial for her taste, and besides, pen and paper are outdated anyway.

Anja Lamm, Paper Love’s only full-time employee, takes an instant dislike to the arrogant, digital-loving snob who’s supposed to be her temporary boss.But thanks to a meddling cat, a business trip to a stationery fair, and an armada of origami boats, Anja soon starts to see beneath Susanne’s aloof exterior, and Susanne discovers how sexy pens and notebooks can be—at least when Anja handles them.

As the end of Susanne’s three-month stay approaches, will she stick to her plan to leave, or will she open her heart to more than just paper love?"

From the Ashes by Meghan Brunner - "There are many who call Pendragon Renaissance Faire home. There are the patrons who visit once a year, faire-folk who live there for two months before moving on, the Fair Folk who never leave, are rarely seen, but whose presence is undeniable...

And - Magick.

Magick is just a part of life. It can be as common and comfortable as an armchair, as rare and beautiful as a shooting star, and as powerful and deadly as a black hole.

Ryna has lived within this Magick and the world of the faire since childhood. She and her family are modern-day gypsies, traveling across the country from faire to faire, earning a living and making a life. For them, "real life" and faire life blend together.

Most faire participants do not live such an integrated existence. For them, faire happens but 15 days of the year, and for those fifteen days, it's a party. For some, the party involves catching up with friends who are as close as family and escaping the world of day jobs, taxes, and house payments. For Liam, it's a chance to exercise a power that is not truly his. As a member of the Village Militia, he portrays the law, and he employs this illusion to prey upon the yearly batch of new entertainers who are dazzled by the brightness of the faire and his apparent gallantry.

Within the ranks of these rookies shines Bea, the younger sister of a veteran "rennie" who has pulled her into this enchanting world. Just out of college, she's struggling to find the moon, the stars, and a sense of belonging. Could the answer to her search lie with Ryna, who seems so Magickally familiar?"

Tangled Vows by Anna Stone - "Escort Ruby Scott is used to waking up in the bed of a wealthy woman. What she isn't expecting is to wake up with a ring on her finger and married to Yvonne Maxwell, one of the executives behind the Mistress Media empire, a woman as alluring as she is cold.

For ten years, Yvonne has been sitting on an inheritance she can't touch until she's married. An encounter with an escort in a red dress presents the perfect solution—a marriage of convenience. In exchange for a year playing the role of her wife, Yvonne offers Ruby a life of glamour, decadence, and more money than Ruby ever dreamed of.

Yvonne is adamant that they keep their arrangement strictly business. But as Ruby's submissive side awakens, Yvonne can't resist the temptation to make Ruby hers, and Ruby is intoxicated by the commanding woman and the release Yvonne grants her.

As Ruby falls deeper into Yvonne's seductive world of luxury and power games, both women struggle to keep their hearts from getting caught up in the passion between them. As threats to their fake marriage plot loom, Ruby and Yvonne find they have far more to lose than just the inheritance."

Star Pirate by Mia Archer - "Travel the galaxies. Meet new and interesting aliens. Seduce them, then rob them blind.

Not bad work for an earth girl abducted from a sci-fi con and thrown into a life of piracy in the civilized galaxies!

Flynn had it all. A modified freighter to travel the galaxies. A loyal crew who’d die for her, and a plan to rob the most powerful royal family those galaxies have ever known!

The one thing she wasn’t counting on? Falling head over heels for the princess she’s trying to rob!

Seleya had it all. She was the princess heiress. First in line for the Selevas throne. And she hated living life in a gilded cage where she was forever a slave to her mother’s whims.

A one night dalliance with a strange noble from an outlying galaxy seemed like just the thing to infuriate the queen. What she wasn’t counting on was that noble being one of the most notorious pirates in the civilized galaxies on a mission to seduce and steal!

The stuck up princess and the smart-mouthed pirate are about to lead each other on a chase across the stars in the biggest heist the civilized galaxies have ever seen. The only question is whether they’ll kill each other or kiss each other when the dust settles!

Star Pirate is an 85,000 word lesbian science fiction romance that’s a little Han Solo, a little Spaceballs, and a guaranteed geeky good time!"

Wildrose by Max Ellendale - "Homicide Detective, Evelyn Grant, has her life wrapped up in a tidy bundle. As long as you don't look too closely. When a child disappears from an end of summer party, Evelyn and her team set out to solve the case. With little to go on and a heavy need for forensic evidence, Evelyn is forced to rely on the genius medical examiner, Ainsley Monson, for information. As the two grow closer, Ainsley's unusual behavior throws up red flags, confounding their working relationship and growing friendship. Can Eve successfully navigate the case, her social life, and copious amounts of wine or will she trip over her own feet and find herself in a less than tactful pickle?"

Tats by Layce Gardner & Saxon Bennett - "Lee Hammond’s girlfriend has moved on to other women. Deciding she’s done the last of her now ex’s laundry, Lee hops on the Harley, ripe for adventure. One thunderstorm, a brief stint as a funeral crasher, two ruined shoes and several cheerleaders later, she’s still planning to run away. Better yet, she’s got one of the cheerleaders along for the ride.

Not just any cheerleader, either. Vivian Baxter is that cheerleader, the one that made Lee certain back in high school that she was never going to be like all the other girls.

Destination? Someplace not Oklahoma. Possibilities? As many as the wide open road can offer. Problems? None at all. Except perhaps Lee’s ex, a hopping mad stripper who wants her Harley back.

Vivian’s feminine wiles prove invaluable in solving their transportation problem just as her own past catches up to them. And Vivian’s past has two legs, a lot of henchman and a very big gun. Lee and Vivian may never get out of Oklahoma, and Oklahoma may never be the same."

The One Who Eats Monsters by Casey Matthews - "Long ago, before history broke in half, elder gods exiled the vengeful deity Erynis to a far corner of Earth. When Ryn is found weakened after saving the life of an innocent villager, the U.S. military mistakes the battered immortal for a feral teenager and places her in New Petersburg, a decaying city full of monsters.

In her clash with the city’s demons, Ryn is confused by her intense emotional connection with Naomi Bradford, a senator’s daughter she has sworn to protect. But while her claws can kill anything that dies (and a few things that cannot), she must also contend with the human race. They lie, they speak in riddles, and to protect her friend, the immortal must navigate the senseless rules of their flawed civilization. Worse, they are fragile—and giving her heart to one makes Ryn afraid for the first time in her eternal life."
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
The Courtship of Julian St Albans by Amy Crook -
Untrue Love by Amy Crook -

Riley Rivers
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Borrowing Blue by Lucy Lennox -
Psycho by Onley James -
Moonstruck by Onley James -
Ready for Love by Stella Starling -
Just a Bit Confusing by Alessandra Hazard -

Mary Calmes
Kiki Clark
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
Ok! So yes, Amazon is The Enemy but! Kindle Unlimited is one area where they seem to give a benefit to readers without simultaneously fucking over authors and so it has become a staple of my reading life. As in, I get most of my books from there.

A subscription is $9.99/month and there are lots of "3 months for $4.99" or "6 months for $30" deals available, as well as free trials that seem to reset about once a year. A subscription allows you to "check out" up to 10 books at a time, and you can return/check out books as many times as you like. Some of the books also come with free audiobook copies. All books are available for download to transfer via USB and yes, that means what you think it means. Syncing to Amazon deletes all books not currently checked out.

Most authors get paid based on the percentage of their book(s) you've read, as determined by Amazon sync. Some authors have purportedly gotten different contracts whereby they get payed by the straight download instead but they seem a statistically insignificant minority. Massage files as seems fair before syncing.

Kindle Unlimited is, primarily, selfpub trash. Don't get me wrong, I love me some indulgent trash romance or filthy trash porn! But there is probably a reason these authors went KU instead of a traditional publisher that would give them, like, ANY marketing support, so, uh, set expectations accordingly.

Oh! Relevant point I forgot! To be KU-available, a book MUST be KU-exclusive. So that cuts out a whole bunch of your midlisters as well as your big names - though some names/publishers have cut deals to release on KU without that pesky exclusivity.

Anyway! KU is fantastic for porn, m/m romance, reverse harem novels, novella serials, nontraditional doorstopper fantasy...if it will Never Be Licensed for Television, it has a place on KU.

Amazon's search is only getting more garbage as time passes, so some on finding the good stuff on your own:
1) a good way to narrow things down is to find an author you like and check out the "people also liked these authors" sidebar on their profile
2) you can look at the rankings of a specific book, pick the most niche list, and scan that for ku titles; a book might be #987 in romance but #10 in 30-minute LGBT reads or whatever, and the latter is MUCH easier to browse
3) start at the kindle unlimited catalog and narrow the categories down until you're ready to start browsing

The key benefit, though, is trying some fucking garbage that you'd never risk if you were straight up paying for it. It's free! The author gets paid something even if you DNF two chapters in and, crucially, they are paid via Amazon's dollars, not yours. You're just paying for the weird access card. Make the most of it!

I have read thirteen books by Erin R Flynn and I don't even particularly like her! I would never pay for her overdramatic cliches! But with KU, all I'm wasting is my time, so yeah, tell me more about how hard it is being a Very Special Magic Princess with six boyfriends.

You will try so many more authors you've never heard of, genres you've never touched. It's amazing. Highly recommended.
strina: text only "i blame fandom" (txt - blame fandom)
Note: I will be annotating characters as Luo Binghe, Original Luo Binghe, Shen Yuan, and Shen Jiu because I'm not fucking with the x | y shit AO3 requires.

Good Vibrations (Mobei-jun/Shang Qinghua, Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS] (WiP)
How to Get Your Man Off in Six Years or Less (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan, Shen Yuan/Various) [SVSSS]
Into the Binghe Verse (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan, Original Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]***

When Tender Feelings Take Over (Original Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]***
How to Handle Laundry when Traveling Inter-Dimensionally (Original Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
murder cat sword only likes its wielder's boyfriend (Original Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
Great and Powerful Oz (Original Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS] (Series in Progress)

AQ (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS/Star Trek]
Dew Over (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
Git Gud (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
hey hey (you you) (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
Help! My Boss is a Bitch (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
High Mountain, How I Long (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]***
How To Stop Being Strung Along By A Guy & Get What You Deserve: 5 Steps to a Serious Relationship! (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]***
may-june relationship (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
Reunited (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
The Favourite (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]

Dual Cultivation (Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan/Liu Qingge) [SVSSS]

can't get by, can't let go (Luo Binghe/Original Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan) [SVSSS]
strina: allison alone caption "the dark, my friend, is a gift. no one takes it away." (allison - the dark)
Note: I will not be separating fic by adaptation.

A Civil Combpaign (Jin Ling/Lan Sizhui, Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Dream a little dream of me (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian, Nie Huaisang/Mo Xuanyu) [MDZS] (WiP)***
Gentians Garden (Various) [MDZS]***
happy not knowing (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian, Lan Xichen/Qin Su) [MDZS]
Lynchpin (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng/Wen Qing) [MDZS]
Marriage Principles (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian, Lan Xichen/Meng Yao) [MDZS]
Meng Yao vs the Board of the Homeowner's Association (Lan Xichen/Meng Yao, Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Polyphonic (Lan Xichen/Nie Mingjue, Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS] (WiP)
promissory notes (Lan Jingyi/Lan Sizhui, Jin Ling/Ouyang Zizhen) [MDZS]
Resolutions (Various) [MDZS]***
The Same Moon Shines (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian, Lan Xichen/Wen Qing/Jiang Chen) [MDZS]

Spilled Pearls (Lan Qiren/Wen Ruohan) [MDZS]***

an act too often neglected (Lan Xichen/Meng Yao) [MDZS]

All Old Things Are New Again (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]***
Become Tomorrow (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS] (WiP)
Brilliant Mistake (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Content Warning: Romance (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Fated (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
hope dangling by a string (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
I Started From the Bottom/And Now I’m Rich (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]***
i'll be your girl (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Impulse Spending (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
In the shadows he lies (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Joy In the Midst of These Things (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Like the dawn you woke the world (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Like stones on an unseen board (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
live from new york: an snl au (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
A Long Road (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS/Valdemar]
LWJ's Canonically Big Dick (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS] (Series in Progress)
my age has never made me wise (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Operation Old Men (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
rather cruelly used and rather reserved (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Rotten Work (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
The Beast of Gusu (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
The Nie Sect Discussion Conference That No One, Ever, Will Discuss Again (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
The Wild Geese's Tomb (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]***
Ticket to Ride (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
To have and to hold (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]***
Twelve Moons and a Fortnight (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Unstrictly Ballroom (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
Where the nightingales are singing, and a white moon beams (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]
You still sound like a song (Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS] (WiP)

(Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian) [MDZS]

---

it is so so weird not to be talking in the tags? but! this is a VERY partial list which i hope to update soon but also it's been literal years since i managed even this much, so???? if anyone has recs for me i would love them as long as they're not jiang cheng/yu ziyuan redemption fics (i hate them and will try them only from very specific authors).

Progress

Apr. 6th, 2019 10:23 pm
strina: text only "I don't know! I'm making this up as I go!" (txt - making it up)
So far I read Steamroller by Mary Calmes, took a 5 hour migraine nap, then read In a Badger Way by Shelly Laurenston and the two latest from Molly Harper, A Few Pecans Short of a Pie and Gimme Some Sugar. Total read time: 7 hours 12 minutes
strina: (txt - triple nerd score)
Getting to Know You Survey

1)What fine part of the world are you reading from today?
Chickasha, Oklahoma

2) Which book in your stack are you most looking forward to?
In a Badger Way by Shelly Laurenston. It's a romance novel where the heroine is a honey badger shifter.

3) Which snack are you most looking forward to?
Tres leches cake. I also have a bottle of strawberry daiquiri mocktail I've been saving since New Year's.

4) Tell us a little something about yourself!
I am such a nerd that not only did I make a special readathon collection, I escalated it to a "readathon" collection AND a "readathon priority" collection (~330 books and 97 books, respectively).

5) If you participated in the last read-a-thon, what’s one thing you’ll do different today? If this is your first read-a-thon, what are you most looking forward to?
I'm not trying to break any personal records this time because I feel crappy. I'm going to take it easy on myself and just accept that I'm going to nap, probably a couple times.
strina: text only "I don't know! I'm making this up as I go!" (txt - making it up)
The next iteration of Dewey's 24 hour readathon is April 6!

I love the readathon? It's a day of reading, what's not to love, and there is a whole Thing about snacks that speaks to me deeply. I just read a thing that might explain the Snack Culture, actually!

Apparently sometimes when your body is full of energy but no purpose it's because your body craves stimulation of some kind, so you should change to a different pattern of activity, different surroundings, or eat something to get yourself on an even keel again. (This is very very paraphrased.)

Because for most people reading is a very "staying still in one place" activity, our bodies are probably desperate for stimulation and so, Snack Culture. You may think I'm exaggerating but it's literally one of the intro questions. I have been saving snacks for MONTHS; I have special imported Japanese KitKats and coffee ice cream and gingerbread truffles. There will be a veggie tray and fruit and chicken and cheese. I have limited edition Welch's nonalcoholic Strawberry Daiquiri to drink! I want to nom it all now, honestly.

I also have...274 books in my readathon Kindle Collection. I obviously can't read all of those in 24 hours, and I equally obviously am not done adding to that collection, are you crazy, there're two more weeks!

NUMBER ONE READATHON TIP: However many books you think you need, at least double it, because anything you don't like, you must abandon quickly and with prejudice. You'll need all your willpower for the staying awake bits, none to spare for slogging though a dull or irritating read.

You'll also want to throw a wide net, genre-wise, but that's less important. I've got romance, heists, nonfiction, parody, urban fantasy, space marines, superheroes, high fantasy, boarding school shenanigans... I've got m/m, f/f, f/m, and reverse harem. I am prepared for pretty much any mood that might strike me, basically.

Anyway, come sign up! I will be doing the actual Day Of stuff on Litsy, because I have, through trial and error, found that to be the least intrusive/distracting of the available methods.
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I've been in fandom for 16 years, at this point - literally more than half my life - and I kind of want to do a big Thing. And I'm a reccer, so.

At first, it was gonna be a whole brackets situation, fic versus fic, last fic standing per fandom thing, but most of my fandoms don't break down that way? It has therefore gotten...bigger.

So if anyone wants to give me a list of like, their ten (or more!) favorite fandoms? Because I am actually having trouble just remembering every fandom I would want to include and that is inevitably step fucking one, so.
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
(Absolutely the appropriate word)

You know that thing, where you have the internet and accidentally read some stuff and start self-diagnosing weird and unusual conditions? And then there's the next part, where you have to talk yourself down, because you don't have nose cancer or whatever, it's just WebMD or Wikipedia making you paranoid?

AFTER YOU ACTUALLY HAVE A COUPLE OF SELF-DIAGNOSES CONFIRMED BY ACTUAL DOCTORS, THE NEXT PART GOES AWAY. FOREVER.

Like, when I was 19 and diagnosed as major depressive and started on medication, I ended up going to the doctor and telling her that the antidepressant was making me crazy in unfun new ways and I was pretty sure I was actually bipolar. So she ran me through some questions and yes, bipolar.

And a couple years ago I read this comedy article about fictional characters with undiagnosed mental illnesses and had a huge "UM..." moment and figured out I probably had schizoid personality disorder. Which I brought up when I started back on my meds and the therapist at my intake was like "yeah, it's on your chart from 2006...did they not mention that?".

Most recently there was that Criminal Minds episode with the girl with polycystic ovary syndrome and my doctor and I talked and the conclusion is I need to get an ultrasound, stat.

So. You know. Now there's this article on sensory processing disorder that's sounding REAL familiar and I basically feel like I need to never read anything about real life ever again.

(But seriously, my whole family has a weird and intense thing with food and textures. And lots of motion sickness/sleep disorders. And stress migraines/photophobia. And there's a creepy posture chart where the apparently fucked up version looks a lot like my x-rays.

You have no idea how much I DON'T want to have a family sit-down about who has been diagnosed with what and what that means for the Family Medical History. At least five of us are on psych meds for reasons we Do Not Talk About.)
strina: try, annie, abed, & chloroformed janitor caption "my whole brain is crying" (community - brain is crying)

My dad always has a shit-ton of flash drives in a box on his desk, because he gets them as swag at conferences and stuff. So I grabbed a couple today, looking for an empty one to put his present on.

I plug the first one in, it’s not empty, so I’m about to close it when…I see a document labeled Will1.

Obviously you see a will, you open it, right? I have read/watched too many mysteries to NOT read a mysterious will.

Except LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES, INTERNET. DO NOT OPEN WILLS. YOU LEARN THINGS YOU NEVER IMAGINED.

MY DAD HAS A SECRET CHILD.

(A SECRET CHILD WHO EXPLICITLY GETS NOTHING IN THE WILL, BECAUSE APPARENTLY IF YOU HAVE A SECRET CHILD AND DON’T MENTION THAT YOU’RE NOT LEAVING THEM ANYTHING ON PURPOSE, THEY CAN SUE FOR PART OF THE ESTATE. LIVE AND FUCKING LEARN!)

…Obviously I googled her immediately. And I seem to have found her.

Why am I so sure, you might ask? Because her first name is spelled unusually (Karlye), she comes from the right area - which happens to be middle of nowhere Oklahoma, so not a huge pool of possibilities to start, and oh, one other thing: when I logged into Facebook for the first time in months, just so I could maybe see more of her profile, SHE HAD ALREADY SENT ME A FRIEND REQUEST EVEN THOUGH WE DON’T KNOW ANY OF THE SAME PEOPLE. EXCEPT, APPARENTLY, OUR DAD.

WHY IS MY LIFE A SOAP OPERA. WHY DO I HAVE TO ASK THAT SO OFTEN. THE WHOLE “YOU’RE THE REASON YOUR DAD AND I ELOPED TO TEXAS AND MADE YOUR GRANDMA SO MAD THAT 25 YEARS LATER, SHE WILL BE ONE OF THE TWO GUESTS AT YOUR COUSIN’S SECRET WEDDING” SHOULD HAVE BEEN PLENTY FOR ONE PERSON. LET ALONE THE “BROTHER IS DATING THE DAUGHTER OF YOUR MOM’S SECOND (COMMON-LAW) HUSBAND AND BY THE WAY, YOU HAVE A SECRET HEIRLOOM OF HER DAD’S FAMILY IN YOUR APARTMENT”. BUT NO. THE UNIVERSE HAS TO GO FULL-ON GODDAMN SECRET BABY.

!!!!!????!!!?

UPDATE: SHIT GOT WEIRDER.

So I was venting to my best friend about the WTFness of it all and she thought she recognized the name, so she got on secret-sister’s Facebook.

APPARENTLY SHE USED TO WORK WITH THE GIRL’S ADOPTED MOM, WHOSE SISTER WAS THE BIO-MOM. NOBODY EVER SAID A WORD ABOUT THE BIO-DAD AND NOW WE KNOW WHY.

Secret-sister is ~18, so was conceived about two years after my parents’ divorce and before he and my stepmom were really a thing. Which makes the secrecy SO MUCH WEIRDER.

I just. Does my grandma know?! Do I tell my brother? How do I bring this shit up without going into “I felt mystery-plot-device obligated to open this will, but that is not the point right now”?

UPDATE UPDATE: I JUST REALIZED THE CONTEXT OF A WILL MEANS HE WAS LITERALLY PLANNING TO TAKE THIS SHIT TO THE GRAVE.


[Note: Post copied from tumblr, because that is where I was when my feelings exploded. They have exploded approximately three more times since, most recent best summed up as "IT IS TWO DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS, AKA, THE LAST TIME THIS YEAR ME, MY DAD, AND MY BROTHER WILL BE IN THE SAME ROOM. AWKWARD SECRET-KEEPING OR EPIC SHITSHOW?"]
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
He sang:
Our generation passed and died.
The killers bred in us the victims grew in us
Blood like water.
Mothers who married enemies.
We called out, "wheat!"
The echo came back, "war"
We called out, "home!"
The echo came back, "war"
We called out, "Jaffa!"
The echo came back, "war"
From that day on we measured skies with chains.

-------------------

Now blooms the spring of the locust.
Over the dead nightingales
the night itself weighs and weighs.
The day inches to birth
while the shut and bolted door
of the sea
rejects us.

We scream.
We dream of weeping,
but tears refuse our eyes.
We twist our necks
in zero hurricanes.

----------------------

But then why won't Eve eat of the fruit?

Why would Eve merely suppress her wishes,
regulate her steps?
Subdue her thirst?
Why would Eve be so compelled
to keep Adam moving around in the Garden of Eden
all their lives?

Readathon!

Oct. 6th, 2015 01:42 pm
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
So Dewey's 24 Hour Readathon is Saturday the 17th. Anyone else planning on participating?

Recs!

May. 3rd, 2015 04:12 pm
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
Kind of! So I've been working on a recs project for, oh, months now, but I haven't been able to brain sufficiently to finish it. The way I structured it, though, means I really don't want to unlock it in its current state. Therefore! Compromise!

The actual, pretty, project-of-my-heart version will someday go live at [community profile] thisisalovesong. The off-the-cuff, just-made-it-past-the-brackets version will be posted intermittently at [tumblr.com profile] lovesonginmyownway. I'm hoping eyes on it will motivate me to not fail at it quite so hard.
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
Am now poking suspiciously at tumblr.

I did just post a bunch of photos of the gorgeous redbuds in my dad's front yard. If you have never seen a blooming redbud tree, you should definitely take a look! People talk up cherry trees a lot, but to me, nothing beats a redbud.

I am going to attempt Dewey's 24 Hour Readathon on Saturday! So I am stockpiling books. The problem with that is not reading the books nownowNOW. I've got a pile of Heidi Cullinan and Terry Pratchett and Wen Spencer and Jennifer Crusie to start me off, but we shall see what my craving's for on the day.

I will be posting updates on that - and apparently some minichallenges? - on Consume All the Things, which is also where I'm sequestering the stuff I'm doing for the 500 episodes and 100 movies memes.

Mixed Bag!

Mar. 4th, 2015 11:32 pm
strina: bo & kenzi in black and white - textless (bokenzi - bw)
New Anne Bishop! Really liked it (not as good as the first, better than the second), and I freaking loved Hope. Actually trying not to think about it too much, because it's another year before the next book. I 100% had a private midnight release party, though, where I set an alarm for a quarter to midnight so I could hunt it down ASAP and read it immediately. Ugh, I just love this worldbuilding so fucking much.

I housesat for my dad last week, which afforded me the opportunity to play Saints Row IV. I bought the game of the century or whatever edition for like $8 in January only to realize, after two days of downloading, that hey, this game is not compatible with XP. That game is fucking awesome, except for the number of missions that require me to drive cars or motorcycles. Tanks and aircraft I can totally handle, but the "steer with A & D" mechanic is BULLSHIT. I failed Matt's loyalty mission upwards of eight times before I started clawing at my own face and had to stop, because I COULD NOT keep close enough to Nyteblade. Playing as the bisexual Latina President of the United States is seriously the best, though. And I would play the main Asha quest again just for the dialogue. ♥

I also got to spend the week hanging out with my cat and y'all, I keep forgetting how goddamn weird he is. Like, don't get me wrong, I couldn't have ended up with a cat better suited to me if I had designed him, but seriously. Giant fucking weirdo. He does this thing? Where he steals my elastic hairbands, but only if they're used and smell like my hair. And then he will carry them around and play with them and place them in the center of his food and/or water bowls. On the other hand, he is the chillest cuddler of a cat I've ever had. Most cats, you move more than twice and they are out, they can find a better place to sleep. With Fred, I can move me, I can move him, I can lean the chair back, whatever. He will legitimately lay on me for 6 hours or more. I say 6 hours because that is pretty much the longest I can have a cat on me and not fall asleep, but I have spent 12 hours in the recliner and woken up to find him in the same spot, so.

Just surfacing from a deep dive into Hobbit fandom. Or into Bilbo/Thorin, really. I kind of have a fandom hangover? From a poor dismount?

It's like you acquired a fuckton of delicious chocolate and then after you ate a bunch and it was amazing and you went for more, you found out that actually, you had eaten all the chocolate and all the enticing stuff you were staring at was in reality CAROB.

In other words, that feeling of "why does this story have so many fucking kudos when it is blatantly a poor imitation of the awesome story I read earlier" times a bunch of stories in a row = bitterness and ennui. And stalking keelywolfe and scarletjedi for updates.

Can't wait for Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt on Friday! Also excited for: Battle Creek (first ep free on Vudu), Community (March 17!), and CSI: Cyber, because I have a weirdly deep affection for James Van Der Beek? It's not even mostly Dawson's Creek related (I was definitely a Pacey girl); he just seems so willing to laugh at himself and it's really fucking charming.

I've been watching various episodes of QI and the Big Fat Quiz on youtube and being jealous of British game shows. American game shows do not get to tell that many dirty jokes. Noel Fielding requesting "a blowie from the puppet" to participate remains the best.

Currently looking through old ebook recs for authors I need to check for new books. Mary Calmes has something that looks awesome, but after her last few, I'm trying not to get too excited. Spotted an interesting looking Robin Roseau scifi on Amazon and am torn between "space trade and culture clashes are two of my favorites! ROWNT FOREVER" and lingering "it's a TRAP" feelings from the Madison Wolves series (FUCK that series, SO hard).

Fingers crossed for something good, because I am like...three disappointments away from a long cranky wallow in "shit I have read before that I know won't hurt me".
strina: allison alone caption "the dark, my friend, is a gift. no one takes it away." (allison - the dark)
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT.
strina: human erica caption "the tragic can go fuck itself" (erica - the tragic can)
Going through one of my periodic fandom-trauma induced download sprees. RPF fandoms in particular give me angst sometimes, guys. I just get superafraid of logging on and everything being GONE. Because, you know, SOMETIMES IT IS.

So I am currently downloading the shit out of everything/everyone I've ever liked in hockey RPF.

Relatedly, I need so much more Sid/Geno in my life. Just re-read Highway Unicorn and I love it/them SO FUCKING MUCH.
strina: text only "age of the geek, baby. we run the world" (text - age of the geek)
I really fucking love Vudu, you guys. I know Walmart is terrible, so it burns to so strongly prefer their service, but its just so great for me. I love the design of the interface, I love the controls (scene selection is available for literally everything in my library that isn't a five-minute featurette!), I love the shitload of free first episodes I've collected. I love being able to share my shit with up to five people (note: works fucking great for movies - 75/76 viewable - not so great for tv - ~30/140).

I just fiddled with the closed caption options for the first time beyond turning them on (in my experience, much more accurate subtitles than broadcast, but I only use cc because I sometimes have trouble with dialogue, so). Turns out green text with a transparent background just instantly made my eyes feel better.

Now I'm going to go watch Anslo Garrick pt 1 for the umpteenth time, because the Braxton episode mostly felt like a pale imitation and now I have a craving.

Goddammit, y'all, I need so much Red/Liz fic. SO MUCH. Also, Hardison & Aram being bros. It would be fucking beautiful.

Justified

Jan. 28th, 2015 02:21 am
strina: allison alone caption "the dark, my friend, is a gift. no one takes it away." (allison - the dark)
I am in the last few days of my Amazon Prime trial (would love to have it - cannot afford it) and I am binge-watching Justified. I watched season one as it was airing but lost track of it after that.

It's weird, in that I would absolutely recommend it, but I wouldn't rewatch or want to own most of it. Each season is such a tight arc that it's hard to separate a single episode out. My preferences run much more toward stand-alones, where you should know the characters and setting, but it doesn't matter if you've seen the whole story so far.

I fucking love Loretta McCready, you guys. I have wanted to watch season two since that Girl in the War vid came out and it definitely did not disappoint. I love her, I love Mags, I love Carol Johnson telling Boyd and Raylan that their history sounds like a love story.

I really enjoyed the Drew Johnson storyline, but it did make it clear to me that while I love every single moment of Raylan and Boyd interacting, I have basically zero interest in Boyd otherwise. I fastforwarded through a fuckton of the Crowder Criminal Empire shit.

Part of that is probably bitterness, because Johnny and company use a lot of screen time I would prefer to spend with the Marshals, because there is never enough Art and Tim and Rachel (especially Tim).

There isn't a lot of fic, but a bunch of it is fucking amazing. I deeply enjoy how, about once a story, someone in the fic will stop and comment about how unfairly beautiful Raylan Givens is. Because fuck yeah, he is.

The amount of zombie/apocafic does put me in mind of astolat talking about Knocking Over the Table, how she basically had to end the world to give her pairing a chance at a happy ending.

I am so sad, thinking about that, that no show will ever be a crime drama for five seasons and then have an apocalypse hit in season six, because that genuinely sounds fucking amazing. Not even specifically Justified, just anything.

Projects

Jan. 17th, 2015 11:32 pm
strina: stock icon of cherries against a green background - default icon (Default)
Love song progress: 6/83.

Poems: 1/?. (!)

Books: 2/52.

Movies: 9/100.

Episodes: 101/500.
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